Recently, I was in a convenience store buying a bag of ice when I turned my head to see the most miserable couple in the universe. The man—a beefy, no neck kind of guy with six pack abs and bulging biceps—was putting his woman (his property, it seemed) down by calling her names.
“B, you don’t need any friggin’ candy bar, “No Neck snorted. “You’re a fat cow as it is!”
The attractive, young woman was Olive Oil skinny. She could have benefited from an entire bag of candy, much less one bar. But No Neck seemed intent on breaking her spirit, making her cry.
The store was filled with mostly men, many who thought about taking out the trash—hauling No Neck to the nearest dumpster. Yes, we thought and, yet, did nothing.
Back in my truck, I thought about my own girlfriend (not my property). I love her. I’d never do such a hurtful thing. Yet, looking at my reflection in the mirror, I asked myself a direct question: Was I all the man to her as I needed to be? Of course, I reasoned, it had to be yes. In truth, however, I had to admit the answer was a sorrowful NO.
So, what does a woman want in a man? Simply put, real women want a real man that:
Listens. I don’t know about you, but I often find myself interrupting my girlfriend when she’s expressing her concerns. My interruptions are meant to be helpful, as if to assure her the problem or concern is minor. In turn, I’m dismissing her, saying “Your input, concern, situation, or problem is unimportant, honey.” Instead, I need to shut my mouth, look at her directly, and listen attentively. Her concerns matter.
Loves. Men are physical beings. We’d want sex even if Mister Happy was on fire! For women, however, love begins in the sexiest part of her anatomy—the brain. Don’t tell a woman that you love her; show her. Cook for her—and clean up immediately afterwards. Ask about her day—and actually listen. Do the laundry. Read to the children. Make her a warm bath. Love comes in all forms, not just between the sheets.
Understands. Understanding comes through keen observation and effective listening. Notice your special lady’s mood, body language, and silent messages. Listen for her verbal cues, voice inflection, and even the sound of her movement. Offer to help, yet don’t lean over her or whimper like a scolded puppy if she refuses. Sometimes, everyone needs a little breathing room or the right to resolve an issue on their own. Besides, she’ll ask you for help if needed.
Works. Women respect a man who works. Most women will understand if you’re out of a job due to the economy. But, she won’t understand if you’re lounging on the couch eating potato chips and watching sports all day. Grow some stones and man up. Do something. Do anything. Be productive. Make money, even if it means donating plasma.
Shares. Most men are not as verbally expressive as women. Tell her how you feel inside. Share information about your day, dreams, ideas, and, quite often, about your feelings. Let her know you find her to be the most incredible woman on the planet. Speak with enthusiasm. Speak from the heart. Just don’t write the Great American Novel.
Protects. No, I’m not talking about going Jackie Chan on someone who comes within three feet of your special lady. Instead, make sure to protect her heart, health, safety, and emotions on a daily basis. Let her know, through actions and few words, that you are her White Knight—always her shield in good times and bad. Do whatever it takes in the name of love.
Plays. In closing, I suggest you live, laugh, and love your special woman every single day—not just weekends. She is, after all, the love of your life. Make every day count.
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